In June 2026, I started posting on TikTok as “the 67-year-old gay man,” simply to share and reflect on my experiences with love, dating, loneliness, relationships and life in general. I quickly discovered that those messages resonated with far more guys than I ever expected.
I don’t feel much connection with what LGBTQI+ has come to represent. Same-sex attraction is simply part of my life. I don’t want to get lost in an alphabet soup, and I don’t believe the fact that I’m attracted to men defines who I am. It is one part of me, not my entire identity. There is much more to life than who we are attracted to. That is why I created Gay Lazarus.
I wanted to build a place where gay men can connect, exchange ideas, get to know each other and simply talk. A place that feels safe, private and welcoming. Whether you live in the countryside, a small town or the middle of a huge city, the idea is the same: you should have somewhere to go where you can feel understood, connected and part of something.
The private WhatsApp group is the everyday heart of the community. It is open 24/7 for conversations about gay life, dating, relationships, sex, ageing, loneliness, friendship, starting over and whatever else happens to be on your mind. You can ask questions, share experiences, offer advice, or simply read along when you feel like it. The point is not that I have all the answers. The value comes from gay men with different lives and experiences talking honestly with one another.
The weekly AMA gives you a predictable time when I will be in the group and available live. It is a text chat, not a video call or formal seminar. You can ask me anything that fits the spirit of Gay Lazarus, whether it is about dating, relationships, getting older, being single, sex, loneliness, starting again or simply something you want another perspective on. Other members can join the conversation as well, so it becomes less of a lecture and more of a real discussion.
Access to gay specialists will bring people into the community who can answer questions that are better handled by someone with professional expertise. That might include gay doctors and sexual-health specialists, therapists, lawyers, financial advisers and other professionals who understand the particular issues gay men sometimes face. These will be occasional sessions rather than a replacement for professional advice, but they should give members access to informed people who actually understand the context of gay life.
The Gay Lazarus retreats will take the community out of the phone and into real life. Three times each year, members will have priority access to a private international retreat, planned around three anchor destinations: Bangkok in February, Lisbon in June and Buenos Aires in October. The idea is not to create a packed schedule of workshops or self-improvement sessions. It is to spend a few days together somewhere interesting, with good meals, conversations, excursions, plenty of free time and the chance to turn online connections into real friendships. Attendance will be optional and priced separately, but members will have first access to the limited places.
The private community opens on October 1, 2026. Founding Members who join before then receive free lifetime access.